i’ll take, “confusing and upsetting birth defects” for $500, alex

“People who have kidney stones often report the sudden onset of excruciating, cramping pain in their low back and/or side, groin, or abdomen. Changes in body position do not relieve this pain. The abdominal, groin, and/or back pain typically waxes and wanes in severity, characteristic of colicky pain (the pain is sometimes referred to as renal colic). It may be so severe that it is often accompanied by nausea and vomiting. The pain has been described by many as the worst pain of their lives, even worse than the pain of childbirth or broken bones. “

The hot bath helped only a little, but now overwhelmed with pain I lean over and throw up violently into the draining tub. And again. And again. Aware I might not have an appetite for the meal I’m rejecting. It smells foul but not as bad as the benign and delicious confectionery I’d smelled a few minutes before, just as I felt myself getting violently ill and when the nausea began. Vomiting is constructive and briefly supersedes the pain. Sick, dizzy, and in breathtaking pain, now, all my evening plans dashed. For the moment. I ask my daughter to bring me a towel and I wrap myself up and lie on the couch and pray.

I never know when I’m going to have just a little ache, a distraction that leaves me slightly breathless, or whether soon I’ll be sweating and my blood pressure up and then, vomiting. The vomiting at least relieves the nausea, or so it seems. Sadly I’m watching my pain meds leave my body, not that they make enough of a dent to make it all go away, but they help a bit.

It goes on and on for seemingly forever, but it’s only about two and a half hours of horror.

A friend gave me a book today and when finally the pain eases of to being only minorly-distracting I can read. Gratefully. Then, get dressed. Slowly. I remain on the couch and finish this good book; Hutch pads over and lets me give him good scritchinz. Ralph and the kids take him for a walk as I am too sick, already thinking of earlier today when I took my dog on his first off-leash walk, which was awesome, and I was irritated I didn’t have sunglasses, but I didn’t think I’d be going through this crap tonight.

“It has been said that kidney stones are the worst pain imaginable.” You know I’ve been through labor pain and I’d rather do that. At least with labor pain you get a break. And as my daughter reminds me, “you get a baby too.”

By the way I hope a reader can send me a graphic old-timey rendition of kidney stones, like my old favorite, “the gout”. Maybe you have to go through it to understand.

Another day, and hoping for a night where I don’t wake up gasping in pain.

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